Time...

Time stops for no one...

At times, the unstoppable passage of time can be our biggest enemy. In other situations, time can be our biggest ally...it all comes down to your individual perspective of the situation at hand.

Lifelong 'frenemy,' time, has brought another chapter of my life to a close. My little one finished up his last day of preschool yesterday...it's most definitely a bittersweet occasion. I'm without a doubt excited for my son as he starts kindergarten next week. New school, new experiences, new opportunities...he will take his first step into his new school next week, the beginning of a lifetime of learning. A part of me cannot wait for this new leg of our lives to get started.

What will his teacher be like?
What will his classmates be like?
What kind of student will he be?
Did I choose the right school?

And then, of course, my thoughts can't help but turn to myself and the myriad of changes that are also going to occur in my own life as a result of him starting kindergarten. For the most part, I am overjoyed and welcome these changes. Finally, I'll get the opportunity to meet new people. Finally, I will get the chance to start working more and more independently. Finally, I will get started on my 'adult life' and no longer be stuck in an endless rut of feeling like I'm going nowhere.

Yet, despite all of these excited changes, I couldn't help but feel a twinge of sadness when I picked up my little guy from his preschool yesterday. This was it. The last time I would ever drive to that familiar building to pick him up. The last time I would go to his cubby and pick up his things. Never again will I open that classroom door and see his beaming face as he exclaims, "Mommy!" and runs into my arms with the worlds most perfect hug and kiss. Gosh...I hope this keyboard is waterproof :(

So it begins. My baby boy is growing up, just like he has been all along. I'd better be careful, one day I'll take too long to blink and a young man will be standing where my kindergartner is supposed to be. Time certainly has a was of sneaking up on you when you least expect that it will.

But I will do my best to accept all the inevitable changes with as much optimism, patience, and grace as I can. What better opportunity would there be to close all of doors to painful things of the past?

Now, more than ever, I need to be an example for my son. I need to show him what it's like to be a responsible adult, a dutiful follower of Christ, and a loving and caring person. I have to prepare him for the road that lay before him and the hardships and joys along the way. Even more challenging, I have this daunting, herculean task meant for two people, and I'm facing it by myself. Failing or faltering is not an option, my son's growth and development as a person is what's at stake. To be honest, the gravity of the situation is overwhelming at times and I feel the crushing pressure trying it's best to break me down...and sometimes it does. Sometimes, I feel like all I can do is sit and cry about how unfair things can be.

And I think it's alright to cry sometimes. It's good to embrace those feelings, otherwise they'll always be there lurking beneath the smiling surface awaiting their break free and wreak havoc in the most destructive of ways. I know that I need to have faith that there is a divine plan with good things in store for both myself and my son.

That being said, I know that I have some loose ends to tie up and some doors to close. I intend to put an end to hurtful, toxic habits that could jeopardize a happy future for my little family, the first of which is Facebook.

I know that there are plenty of positive, constructive ways that the social networking site can be used, but I think you'd agree that there are just as many of the opposite. So many people become so enthralled in this virtual world, that their actual lives suffer as a result. There was an article that I stumbled on the other day that stated that Facebook was among a growing list of causes of divorce. Facebook. It's just a silly website you guys! People are becoming so dependent on this virtual world that we've created in the last decade or so, it's scary. I've done it before, and although it is hard at first, deleting a Facebook account is one of the most freeing actions a person can take. You'll be amazed, and likely ashamed, when you realize how much time you actually spend on those sorts of sites...precious time that was used to stare at a computer screen or smartphone rather than things that are truly worth your time...like watching your children grow.

I don't know exactly when, but I will deactivate my account sometime before Monday. I will continue to write posts for this blog, and anyone who would like to read it might want to save a shortcut to my blog as I will no longer have a Facebook wall to post up my new blog entries. Most people that I personally know already have my phone number or email address, but if you need either, let me know!